What Is Domestic Violence and Abuse

Domestic violence is very serious, it can affect men, women and children. Usually men are the abusers but men can also be abused. In children when they witness the abuse. For anyone experiencing domestic violence, the effects is trauma.
And the process for recovery is long and hard. You can recover, but it will take hard work on your part. And you are going to have to want it. You should talk with a trusted family member, friend or counselor. And God is the true healer. So please don't leave Him out of your recovery.
It can and will affect you mentally and physically. No to people are the same and things don't affect you in the same way. When you are experiencing or living with domestic violence you don't feel safe most of the time, and it causes you to have trouble sleeping. Some days you don't want to get out of bed because you don't want to face the day. You start isolating yourself from family and friends. Even your behavior change at work or school. You begin to lose trust in people. It causes you to feel helpless and hopeless because of the shame and guilt. But it is not your fault. It's your abuser that has the problem and needs help. But they have to want to change.
I know, because I witnessed domestic violence as a child growing up, then I married a man, that I though loved me. Then again, I guess, he did love me, but had a problem. And he abused me for many, many years. I stayed because I didn't know any better at first, then over time, I thought I could change him. I could be enough. Now, I lived to help others by sharing my story.
So why, is it not recognized or overlooked, especially if it's emotional abuse vs physical abuse, as a serious crime. I believe physical, emotional and sexual abuse is equally bad. And these problems should be addressed. Most cases is men hitting, punching, threatening and emotionally abusing women. But men can get abused too. It also affects children growing up seeing and hearing their parents fight.
It kills your spirit, causes depression and low self-esteem.
The Cycle of Abuse goes in a circle like this: Abuse - he feel guilty, make excuses - then the fantasy, you get the flower, candy, sweet takes and making love - then the setup, - the abuse come again.
Verbal, physical and emotional abuse done to your spouse or partner to dominate and control them. It's also more ways to abuse the other, like financial abuse, spiritual abuse and sexual abuse.
Abuse
Guilt
Excuses
Normal behavior
Fantasy
Setup
The first step is recognizing the abuse. Once you realize, decide if you are going to leave or stay in the relationship. Please protect yourself and its people and agencies out there to help. Be safe. Love Doesn't Have to Hurt.
God bless,
Denise

Denise M Hardnett Love Doesn't have to Hurt book an Inspirational guide for women in or affected by domestic violence. Release date September 2015.

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Domestic Violence: The Facts

According to recent findings by the Office for national statistics, it is estimated that around 1.4 million women and 700,000 men from the UK suffered from domestic abuse in 2014.
This may seem like a staggeringly high number - and it is - but these results actually show a decline in the number of domestic abuse cases in comparison to 2011/12, when there was an estimated 2.1 million cases of domestic abuse in the UK.
Domestic violence has a higher repeat rate than any other crime and can occur in any relationship regardless off ethnicity, religion, class, age, sexuality, disability or lifestyle. Studies show that women in lower income households are 3 times more likely to be the victims of domestic abuse compared with those from a higher income family and the majority of attacks are alcohol-fuelled.
The sad truth is that less than half of these attacks are reported to the police and statistically, women will endure an average of 35 attacks before informing the police. But not everyone gets the help they need- an average of 2 women a week are killed by a present or previous partner in the UK.
Both male and female victims of domestic abuse have many reasons for not seeking out the help they desperately need in order to escape abusive relationships. Many fear the humiliation and shame they will receive from their family and friends as well as their partner. For single parents, there is the fear of not being able to cope with the pressures of raising children alone, both financially and emotionally. Most abuse victims suffer from such low self-esteem and confidence, usually bought on by their partners physical and mental attacks, that they are too scared to leave them or may even feel that the situation is somehow their own fault. Others simply do not know where to go for help or advice.
If you think that a friend or relative may be the victim of domestic abuse, ask them in private. They may not tell you straight away and may feel pressurised into doing so but if you take a gentle approach and let them know that you are there for them if they want to talk, eventually many will. Educate yourself on the signs of domestic abuse, the more you know about it, the quicker you will be able to see the signs. Check out nationaldomesticviolencehelpline.org.uk for more information on how you can help a sufferer of domestic abuse.
If you are the victim of domestic violence the most important thing to remember is that you are never alone, there is always help and support out there for you. victimsupport.org.uk, refuge.org.uk and womensaid.org.uk are all great websites providing the help and information you need as well as a direct phone service if you want to talk to someone. Never feel that the abuse is your fault and do not take it upon yourself to try and change your partners behaviour, some behaviours - as sad as it may seem - cannot be changed. Don't allow yourself to become another domestic violence statistic, you are worth so much more.
Peace and Love
xKx

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Sexual Abuse Should Not Be Alleged Lightly

Before accusing an ex of sexually molesting a child, you should consider several factors. If you have a child with someone, you should have some idea of who they are, and what they are capable of doing. A parent who has never behaved inappropriately towards your child while you were together isn't likely to become a molester when you are apart. This doesn't mean you shouldn't investigate your concerns. When your child has visitation with your ex, he or she isn't the only person with whom your child has contact. Friends and other family members may also have access to your child, and it is possible that one of them could have done something that is inappropriate. It is also possible that an adult assisting the child with toileting, dressing or bathing could have had physical contact with the child that would have been improper in other situations.
Among the things you should explore is what the child said that alerted you to the possibility of abuse. Where was she touched and by whom is the most important factor in making your determination. Find out who has contact with the child when she is visiting her other parent. Tell the other parent what the child said that made you think there might be a problem. It is very likely that the other parent will be as interested in getting to the bottom of the situation as you are. If he or she is defensive or uncommunicative, you may have to seek professional intervention to find out what actually happened.
Even if your relationship with your ex is less than friendly, it is the obligation of both of you as parents to protect your child from those who could cause her harm.
When you approach the child's other parent, be courteous and non-accusatory. Pose your concerns as a problem you need to work on resolving together, not just a convenient opportunity to prove that the other parent is a pervert or evil doer.
Finally, and this is very important, you should look in your own back yard. Are you living with someone new? Are there step children in either home who are emotionally disturbed or violent? Do you have friends and relatives who should be considered? Does your child attend a day care center, church group or sports training with strangers? He or she may lay the blame at the other parent's feet out of fear of repercussions from the true perpetrator. In addition, leading questions such as "did your daddy do this?" could elicit damning answers from a confused child who isn't sure what happened, who did it, or even whether the behavior in question is abnormal.
The police and welfare departments will be involved if sexual molestation has actually occurred. Your family could end up in the system for years, even if nothing inappropriate happened. Your child is entitled to your protection, but he is also entitled to your sound judgment. That is why it is important for you to ferret out the truth when your child may have been sexually abused.

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Life After Domestic Violence - Turning a Negative Into a Positive

Hi Online family,
Domestic violence is any type of abuse, physical or emotional or both between intimate couples to gain or keep control over the other. And it hurts. If affects adults and children. But it hurts children the most. I know, because it happened to me. Children are innocent and doesn't know why or the causes of domestic violence. When children live in a home with domestic violence, It might teach some that it's okay to accept abuse and others, it's okay to abuse others. Let's start turning a negative situation into something positive. Once we learn about domestic violence and want to make a difference. Please do.
If you see someone getting hit, call 911.
Nearly 1.5 million high school students nationwide physical abuse from a dating partner in a single year.
One in three adolescents in the U.S. is a victim of physical, sexual, emotional, or verbal abuse from a dating partner.
Only 33% of teens who were in a violent relationship ever told anyone about the abuse.
Statistics from a website love is respect.org
We can start by reaching out to others. If you know someone in a violent lifestyle, ask if they want to talk, then listen. Seek help from a professional or trusted adult. Together we can end domestic abuse. One way is to turn a negative into a positive.
Use you life experiences, your testimonies to share with a child or children mentoring them to help with or avoid a bad behaviors. You can also teach them life skill, help with homework, problem-solving skills or just listen to them.
I grew up in a home where I witnessed domestic violence. I know what it felt like to not have enough food, or to live with out heat or lights. You know, how hard it was trying to survive and living in fear. Now, we can turn that around and help a child going through that same situation. Because a life is a terrible thing to waste.
Most of us is trying to survive, and has a story. Turn your negative into a positive by helping someone else.
My life and the things that I had endured taught me, to want better and to do better. I encouraged my children that education and God is the keys to life. Everybody should evaluate their life to make changes for the better.
If you teach a child a hobby or skill that they can use to make money between jobs or supplement their income.
I encourage you to learn from your life experiences and turn a negative into a positive to work toward growth and development to better your life.
If someone say, they love you and the actions are bad. Then you know that's not love. Love doesn't have to hurt.
Remember your Failures and your Success equals Growth.
Denise

Denise M Hardnett Love Doesn't have to Hurt book release date September 2015

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Overcoming Abuse

We can overcome any thing we put our mind to, especially domestic violence and abuse. Determination. I did. Now I am safe and has joy and happiness. And I have forgiven my abusers and I also have forgiven me.
I lived with my abuser for 15 years. When you move to fast and the lack of knowledge and support I spent another seven years in an abusive relationship. I can not promise the road to overcoming abuse will be easy or the process time will be short. With support, knowledge and determination you can do it too. What I can promise, is that you can do it.
We have to learn to love and trust ourself again. At a point in our life we loss the love and trust and in turn, opened the door to the abuse. Please understand that you did not deserve it. People that abuse others learned that by watching others that abused. They saw it as a way of control. Somebody hurt them, so they hurt others. If it never got dealt with, then the cycle of abuse continues. Only when the cycle of abuse is broken, healing comes.
We thought we were in love and didn't know the warning signs of abuse. Once you realize you are in an abusive relationship. Seek help and support to plan and make a way of escape for you and your children.
Knowledge is power! Counseling will help with you to build and rebuild relationship. The first step is to admit you are loved by God. God is the true Healer.
You are Awesome, amazing and worth it and in control of your life. We are the only one that can make decisions for self and our children. We have the power to keep ourselves and children safe and not worry about the next time. Live in a healthy environment because we know that we deserve the best.
God only want the best for his Children and He will never leave or forsake us. God's word is the truth and we can depend on Him.
When you are free from your abuser, you will begin to learn how to live without them. You begin to start your life anew. Start walking, sleeping and eating the right way. Doing things that you use to do, that made you happy, like reading, writing, sports just to name a few.
Now that you know, that you know! Pass it on to others in need. The lesson is to keep control and watch out and know the warning signs to avoid. You will have a great relationship when the time is right. And remember to pass love and encouragement to someone else.
All the best,
Denise

Denise M Hardnett - Love Doesn't have to Hurt, an inspirational book for women living with domestic violence. Release date September 2015.

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The Rise of Relationship Abuse Among High School and College Students in America

On Sept. 13, 2014, 48 Hours aired a revised segment called "Loved to Death" about a high school couple that experienced breakup violence. The breakup ended in a murder on July 3, 2011, that no one saw coming. Not even the victim. The victim's ex-boyfriend suffered from deep depression as diagnosed by a doctor, after the breakup. Tension between the victim and her ex-boyfriend existed whenever they attended the same functions and parties. However, it was the unexpected visit by the victim to check on the state of her ex-boyfriend at his home out of concern and at the request of his mother. The visit that no one knew about led to the victim's death. The behavior and physical abuse of the ex-boyfriend that occurred after the breakup were not expected by the victim or friends and family. Therefore, there were many questions about the breakup and the death of the victim that led to a local campaign that went national how to handle breakups and to encourage healthy relationships among high school students. As a result, The Lauren Dunne Astley Memorial Fund was established in 2014 by Lauren Dunne Astley's parents to raise awareness in three key areas: Effective Teen Relationships, Violence Prevention, the Arts and Community Service.
According to No More Organization (2015), 12.7 million individuals suffer from a form of domestic violence, including sexual assault in the course of one year. Females between 16 and 24 have the highest rate of relationship abuse, which is three times the national average (Love Is Respect, 2015). Twenty-six percent of teenage girls have been subjected to continuous verbal abuse in a relationship (Love Is Respect, 2015). Domestic violence and sexual assault are more prevalent today than ever before, especially among young people. Domestic violence includes dating violence, relationship violence, breakup violence and abuse. One out of every three teenagers has experienced a form of threats or domestic violence from their boyfriend or girlfriend within one year (Liz Claiborne, Inc. & Family Violence Prevention Fund, 2014).
Young people who are victims of domestic violence are more likely to become unhealthy individuals with emotional challenges and engage in abusive relationships (CDC, 2014b). Society has sanctioned norms that promote unhealthy relationships that result from dysfunctional families, unhealthy beliefs and values, negative music, movies, videos, peer pressure, online dating sites and social media to name a few. These social norms depict women as sexual objects of men's affections through control, abuse and often violence. The worst apart about it is that society continues to glamorize it, while statistics continue to show an increase in domestic violence cases in high school and college students. Why does society continue to sanction behaviors that destroy the self-worth of an individual as well as their life at the expense of media and a billion dollar entertainment industry that glamorizes abuse mostly against women? Many organizations have taken a stand to campaign against domestic violence and sexual assault, such as Safe Horizon, Love Is Respect, Center for Disease Control and Prevention (CDC) and many others. No More Organization launched a campaign against domestic violence and sexual assault one year ago in March 2014 targeting college students, individuals and organizations to raise awareness. No More Organization launched a campaign in April 2015 to raise awareness on sexual assault.
In conjunction with No More Organization's campaigns against domestic violence, it is important to raise awareness of relationship abuse among young people. Here are seven warning signs of relationship abuse that young people including parents should recognize and act on. They are:
1. Individual fears his/her partner
2. Individual's partner belittles and humiliates him/her often
3. Individual's partner criticizes him/her and puts him/her down often
4. Individual is embarrassed for friends and family to see his/her relationship
5. Individual's partner does not acknowledge his/her opinions and accomplishments
6. Individual's partner blames him/her for their abusive behavior
7. Individual's partner treats him/her as a sex object with little or no thought for your feelings
According to the CDC (2014a), symptoms of domestic abuse include:
1. Individuals experiencing depression and or anxiety
2. Individuals engaging in substance abuse
3. Individuals experiencing behavioral changes
4. Individuals contemplating thoughts of suicide
If these are signs and symptoms you are dealing with and you don't know what to do, you can get help by contacting Safehorizon anonymously at 800.621.HOPE (4673) and an experienced staff member will listen and assist you. Also, you can look up the Safehorizon.com website for more information. You may not experience abuse. But, you may know someone who does. There are other resources that can assist you located on the CDC's website, such as "Teen Dating Violence." If you interested in raising awareness at your high school or college, visit the websites, such as No More Organization and Lauren Dunne Astley Memorial Fund. These are only some of the many resources available about domestic violence among young people.
Domestic violence is increasing among young people. It is time to take a stand against it and talk about the warning signs and what constitutes a healthy relationship starting with high school and college students now to raise awareness and to stop a growing trend that devalues the self-worth of individuals, especially young women. Domestic violence and abuse is never acceptable. Therefore, we as a society must stop relationship abuse now!
References
CBS News. 2015. 48 Hours: Loved to death.
CBN. January 8, 2015. Protect your health! - part IV. Virginia Beach, VA: The Christian Broadcasting Network, Inc.
Center for Disease Control and Prevention (CDC). 2014a. Teen dating violence.
Center for Disease Control and Prevention (CDC). 2014b. Understanding teen dating violence: Fact sheet.
Lauren Dunne Astley Memorial Fund. 2014.
Liz Claiborne, Inc. & Family Violence Prevention Fund. 2014. Teen dating abuse 2009 key topline findings.
Love Is Respect. 2015. Dating abuse statistics.
No More Organization. 2015.
Safehorizon. 2015. Domestic violence victims: Get help.
Stanton, Glenn T. 2011. "Divorce rate in the church - As high as the world?" Focus on the Family Findings. Focus on the Family.

Sheri E. Ragland, founder and CEO of Buzz About Relationship provides couples with the information they need to address common issues that exist within their relationships through various mediums such as articles, newsletters, blogs and books. We are hoping to expand our product offerings based on feedback from the many diverse and colorful couples we work with. Seven Deep Insecurities Men Don't Want Women to Know written by Sheri E. Ragland is available on our website now at http://www.buzzaboutrelationships.com.
We are proud to develop new information taken from exhaustive research, focus groups and discussions to continually offer fresh, relevant information on our website. As such, we make the information that couples seek readily available. You can trust what we present to you because it's backed by credible research taken from surveys, focus groups and discussions. We offer you that information in an easy-to­ digest format through blogs, newsletters, books and insightful articles. Also, check out our Couplesbuzz podcasts at http://www.couplesbuzz.podbean.com. And, we provide relationship coaching services as well. Come along on a journey with us to understand your relationship, how it works, why it works and how to make it better. Contact us at info@buzzaboutrelationships.com today to find out how we can help.

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The Tyranny of Domestic Abuse and Violence

Everyone wants a relationship that works, whether we talk about a boyfriend-girlfriend scenario, a live in relationship or marriage. If the foundation crumbles because of unceasing violence by either partner, life can be excruciating. Physical violence can pretty much leave the person absolutely shaken unsure about when another attack will manifest. Women from all accounts are prone to dealing with this horror. The problem is that the person inflicting the pain could be a wonderful human being outside closed doors. This kind of individual derives some form of sadistic pleasure as he as he watches his partner shiver with fear. Since his Jekyll and Hyde persona is part of the deal people notice the kind person because he is a pleasure to be around, in a public place. In private, he wrecks havoc and even gets off on this. Living with someone who exhibits these erratic traits of mood swings can seriously take a toll on a person's overall health.
There are quite a number of women and girls the world over who experience mental and psychological abuse on a daily basis. The problem is that not many can report this as there is no evidence because the domestic violence is verbal. The reasoning here is that the significant other has not inflicted any visible scars. Mental torture, another form of domestic abuse can play serious havoc with a person's state of mind and her ability to lead a normal life. Imagine going through life living with someone who does not bat an eyelid about the pain that he is inflicting on his partner! Cruel barbs and tearing the person to shreds is terrible. When the knight in shining armor changes over time, the person believes it is his right to treat his partner shabbily. This is probably because of his lack of self-esteem or what have you; but it can seriously destroy the partner's basic functioning. Retaliating may not be something that the woman/girl would like to do, in case of serious and long-term repercussions.
Economic and financial abuse can also take a serious toll on a homemaker who has dedicated her life to her spouse and family. When the partner abandons her with a series of debts that she never knew about, also constitutes as a form of violence in the worst possible manner. Lenders are not interested in the problem, they want a solution - get back their investment along with the interest. Using the spouse as a prostitute to gain perverse pleasure is another form of abuse that many women find themselves in without a solution. The person who was sugar, spice, and everything nice during courtship is actually the devil in disguise. The spouse or partner indulging in this form of sexual abuse uses every ruse possible to ensure that the woman he is with does not have a way out of the relationship. To get out of this can be very difficult. The spouse/partner/boyfriend ensures that he has something to use against his partner. He may even use this to his advantage so that the woman never gets out of the rut.
There are so many forms of domestic violence occurring today that it has become quite common. When a woman gets out of a terrible relationship, it takes time to restore her self-confidence. A battered woman may even lose hope with some of the legalese since many forms of abuse is not construed as domestic violence. To get back on track and in the real world can take a longer time than one can expect. The only way forward is to get help from a reliable professional who will help the abused deal with the issues, get strong and move on to a better quality of life. This can take time but after a while, one will definitely be in a happier place without the muck.

The terrible problem of dealing with physical and verbal and psychological abuse can leave a person with serious scars for years on end.

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Can A Teen Dating Violence Curriculum Save Our Girls?

Let's talk about boys and your daughter, your niece, granddaughter, your students or perhaps teen girls associated with your faith base or community organizations. Consider this, the harsh reality is that teen girls of today are being subjected to dating abuse at a historic and alarming rate. Teen dating violence and sex trafficking against girls is at an all-time high, reported to affecting 1 in 4 teen girls. This dangerous statistic can result into a debilitating lifelong emotional or physical trauma, even death. There is an answer in the form of a teen violence curriculum to slow the rate of this uphill battle.
You never think teen dating abuse would ever happen to anyone dear to you. However, in all actuality the relationship dynamics of teen girls today, has a different meaning and standard than teen standards 20 or even 10 years ago. What this simply means is that statistics reveals that teen girls are dating in intimate relationships as young as the 5th and 6th grades. These same girls are also being abducted in human sex trading as young as seven years of age.
How can we help reduce or eliminate these silent epidemics? First by supplying parents, adults, and teen girls with a safeguard of an effective arsenal prevention solution. This should be implemented in a teen dating violence curriculum format for multiple venues such as; in the home, schools, community organizations, faith-based organizations.
A competent series should demonstrate a proven track record that would save our teen girls today for life, from dating abuse and the traps of sex trafficking.
So, what if you had access to a powerful, user-friendly, empowering plus educational tool creatively designed just for teen girls. This curriculum will assist in dialog regarding safety awareness and prevention centered around teen dating, teen dating violence, the effects of dating abuse and the pitfalls associated with sex trafficking against teen girls, that also advocates abstinence consideration.
An effective teen dating awareness and prevention series that includes human trafficking awareness curriculum model that addresses teen dating violence is the key. It should possess characteristics that can provide an approach that specifically, helps you break communication barriers regarding dating violence. It should aid girls to identify and recognize typical teen pressures and bad judgments associated with relationships, also encourages restraint from indulging in harmful behaviors. A competent curriculum can also supply teen girls with essential life skills knowledge to identify signs of abuse, how to avoid abuse before it happens and recognize predator traps such as but not limited to sex trafficking.
An adequate prevention series for girls must provide a conductor to build self-esteem and empowerment component that assist teen girls to identify and recognize their value, self-worth and to consider the practice of sustaining from dating and or sexual abstinence until an appropriate age and maturity level.
Most of all an efficient dating violence curriculum should be creatively designed and easy to implement with very little effort. Save that special someone in your life for life, with preparatory and life preserving knowledge. This encourages and protects teen girls from dating violence to make a difference that can drop the devastating acts of violence in relationships and build their academic performance.

Let's Talk About Boyz Dating Violence Awareness And Prevention Series for Girls is a highly sought after teen dating violence curriculum offered by "Safe Zone Spot Life Skills Solutions for Girls". This creatively, empowering, user friendly, yet powerfully effective series offers 14 dynamic sessions along with essential tools necessary to conduct its sessions on the fly and no experience is required to instruct the sessions. "Getting Started" essentials are available in the instructors guide and easy video tutorials are also available for your convenience. This extraordinary curriculum is awesome for girls 8th - 12th grade and great for schools, community organizations, faith based organizations or in the home. Take action stop teen dating violence and sex trafficking today.

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Families With Abuse

Abusive situations in families do not happen in isolation. It is neither bad luck, nor is it the fault of the victim of abuse. Abuse happens within a culture of abuse. That is, there is something that is handed down over the generations that encourages those who abuse and allow those around the abuser to ignore what is happening. While the abuser is certainly responsible for his/her actions, there are other family members who are complicit by their passivity or inability to recognize the signs. Now that society is finally recognizing the prevalence and importance of this issue, families have to take some responsibility and not merely leave it up to the victim to get help.
What do I mean about a "culture of abuse". Abuse flourishes in a family where the parents themselves grew up in an abusive household. For example, more times than not, when an adult survivor of sexual abuse comes to see me, it comes to light that either or even both parents may have experienced sexual abuse when they were growing up. That is even the case when the abuser is a sibling and not a parent, grandparent or uncle/aunt. If not directly, then they were probably in a household where abuse occurred. Therefore, they have been hiding their own secret and easily fall into denial about what is occurring now.
Even when parents do notice, and do take action, the family must look at not only what happened, by why it happened. If an adult is the abuser, that adult must be held accountable. While we try and understand how it could have happened, we help the victim to heal. And everyone else in the family - to a much lesser degree - is a victim as well. That is, if we all acknowledge our part, then we can also see that everyone has been adversely affected by what has happened.
This is much clearer when the abuser is a sibling. It is much clearer because it is much harder for parents to know how to correctly deal with sibling abuse. They feel that they have to make a choice, if they reach out to the victim; they have to condemn their other child. It can feel like a "Sophie's Choice", save one child, lose the other. But that shouldn't be the case. Both children need to be helped. The abuser is crying out for help even if he/she knows does not know it. Whether it is sexual, physical or emotional abuse, the abuse is a symptom of something else. What the parents might not want to look at is the fact that it may be a symptom of an overall abusive or neglectful environment. No one is trying to turn the parents into villains. But if they won't look at themselves, they are, at the very least, not being good parents.
What about when it's a parent or grandparent who is the abuser? Does the family have to cut off from that adult? Perhaps. But by doing nothing, you are siding with the abuser against your own child or grandchild. Unfortunately, many adults unconsciously make that decision because they either don't want to break up a marriage or they don't want to lose a parent or a brother/sister. There is no easy answer. And it would be cavalier to say that no matter what; you have to protect your child. But in my world, no matter what, you have to protect your child.

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Types Of Domestic Violence

Although domestic violence cases involving celebrities are quick to make the headlines, this issue is shockingly common among everyday Americans. The Centers for Disease Control (CDC) reports that over 12 million American women and men experience physical abuse, rape, or stalking by a significant other each year. Physical abuse ranges from hitting a significant other to rape, and can tragically end in murder. In 2007, the CDC reported that intimate partner violence resulted in 2,340 homicides. This problem transcends all races, ethnicities, classes, and sexual preferences. Typically associated with violent physical behavior, the person being abused commonly finds themselves first subject to other forms of abuse. Here are some early warning signs and the different types of domestic abuse.
Red Flags
The following actions may be early warning signs of an abusive relationship:
- Pressuring a girlfriend or boyfriend to commit early on in a relationship
- Publicly or privately insulting the victim
- Raising accusations of infidelity
- Exhibiting controlling behavior, such as preventing the victim from working, engaging in social occasions, and using their phones
- Becoming physically threatening by hitting walls, breaking things, and even hurting family pets
Types of Abuse
The National Domestic Violence Hotline reports that not all abusive relationships look or sound the same. They list five categories of abuse:
Physical abuse is aggressive behavior that ranges from bruising to murder and commonly begins with something trivial that quickly escalates into frequent and serious attacks, including
- Forbidding their significant other from sleeping or eating
- Driving recklessly while their significant other is in the car with them
- Punching, biting, or choking their significant other
Emotional abuse can impact the mental health and well-being of their significant other, through:
- Cheating on the victim and then accusing the victim of infidelity
- Attempting to control someone's appearance and how they dress
- Persistent criticism
Sexual abuse occurs when a victim is forced to take part in an unwanted sexual activity, such as
- Forced sexual acts
- Forced pornography viewing
Similar to sexual forms of abuse, reproductive coercion is when the attacker forces the victim to take part in sexual intercourse or
- Sabotages birth-control methods
- Forces their partner to either get an abortion or prevents them from getting one
- Continues to keep their partner pregnant shortly after each birth
Behaviors that maintain control over finances constitute financial abuse. These can include
- Preventing a partner from working or limiting their work
- Stealing a partner's money or maxing out their credit cards
- Tracking a partner's spending or giving them an allowance
In all but three states, mandatory reporting requirements exist for domestic violence. Although these requirements vary in each state, healthcare providers in most states who suspect maltreatment could be found guilty of a misdemeanor crime if they fail to report it to law enforcement within 48 hours. Of course, when law enforcement shows up to investigate the allegation, they may create a dangerous environment. If any family member, friend, healthcare provider, or the person being abused is preparing to file a report, the safety of the person being abused should first be guaranteed. Resources are available through hospitals and community groups. Furthermore, the person being abused should contact a domestic violence attorney to learn more about their legal options.

When seeking attorneys to assist with domestic violence, Roseville, CA residents should contact http://www.bedorelaw.com/Violent-Crimes-Overview/Domestic-Violence.shtml.

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